not sleeping


Sooooo i’m not sleeping…. at all… its not like insomnia… because i can lay down… and start to fall asleep… but i wake up about every half hour, mind racing, thoughts all jumbled about health care this and demand for quantity that and solve for this and myocardial infarction that… its rediculous…

it started about a week and a half ago waking up every couple hrs, i figured it was because the weather was changing or because my stress level was upping a bit but now it is out of hand… i have just completely fallen apart… last night steve thought i was in the midst of a full on panic attack at 11pm because i was breathing so heavy…. thing was, i didn’t even realize it…

two mornings ago i when steve’s alarm went off i woke up sitting up right in the bed… like i was already sitting up and the alarm just made me snap out of whatever delirium i was in… like seriously this cannot be healthy for me…

my suspicion is that getting home at 8 pm, eating late, doing homework until 10pm and then going straight to bed in an effort to get 8 hrs of sleep (HA) is giving me no time to let my brain slow down and just relax…. but the problem is… when else do i do my homework… some i can get done on the weekends, but some doesn’t get assigned til a tuesday and is due on a thursday… and worse yet… i THINK i’m doing my best time management by spacing out my work based on due dates and yet i’m still scrambling on some things last minute…

so here i am running on maybe 1-2 hrs of real sleep over the past 3 or 4 nights and its killing me… i calling it quits before my night class which the prof puts his lecture online and i can listen to over the weekend… and at 3pm i’m heading out of the office picking up some real food and doing my finance hw before it gets dark out… and maybe just maybe i’ll get a few more hrs of sleep tonight…

otherwise i’ll be seeing a doctor at the health center on monday… because this isn’t a life… i don’t know how ppl can do it…

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